Have I let MYSELF go? Or THAT self go?

Last week I stumbled on upon the blog of SuperKawaiiMama. I must admit my first thoughts were; wow she is so gorgeous and such a great writer. Not often you get that combination. How does she manage to look so good and be a full time mama?

Then, coincidentally the following day I read her post “Why Do Women Let Themselves Go?” and it got me thinking. Instead of bombarding her blog with my essay of a reply I have answered her question here and I’ll link it through.

SuperKawaiiMama is very gorgeous and very glamorous. From her photos I see that she has a lot of beautifully applied makeup, her hair has been set and her clothes are brightly coloured, perfectly cut works of retro art. Her section entitled daily outfit provides readers with a glimpse into her pretty world.

To SKM I’d be her poster girl for “women who have let themselves go” what with my dark coloured clothing, bits of beige and taupe here and there. My often washed but not set hair, my scuffed ballet flats and my scruffy tops and jeans. I certainly don’t wear makeup most days and I never wear heels during the day anymore.To me, I still look maybe a tiny bit stylish but I certainly would fall into SKM's definition of letting myself go. Yes often, I wear whatever I can grab quickly before the little one starts tearing things off shelves or emptying my makeupbox.

So, have I let myself go? No, I do not feel that I have. I think I have let “that” self go.

Which self? The one who valued appearances so highly. The one who got up early to set her hair in hot rollers, apply makeup and squeeze into gorgeous outfits and high heeled shoes. That was not MY self but rather, my appearance. To me the sense of self is a complex thing.

It runs deeper than MAC Mineralize foundation and glittering Jimmy Choos. It is who you are to you, to your friends, your family and the world. What you love, what you value and what you think… for me, it isn’t what I wear or how many heads turn when I enter a room.

Sure, having a baby has meant that even if I wanted to spend 40 minutes on my face and another 40 on my hair, I couldn’t. Why? Because I get so little sleep as it is, I refuse to get up at 4am to apply makeup and blow dry my hair and Tinker won’t sit still long enough for me to do it while she is awake. As for my clothes. Well if I am honest, there are 3 reasons for my glamourless outfits:

1. When I became a mum, fashion, glamour, entertainment seemed to pale in comparison to the depth of feelings I have about life, babies and love now. I’m just not that bothered.
2. Having always been super thin I went from 45 kilos on the day I announced my pregnancy to 73 the day I gave birth, I guess to me no matter how gorgeous the outfit is, I won’t love my appearance until I am back to my old shape. Sure I’m no oompah loompah but to go from an Aussie size 6-8 to 10-12 is a big change and if I am honest I don’t think I’m that worried about it. With my best friend having cancer and my beautiful daughter growing up and amazing me every day, fitting into a teeny tiny dress isn’t really on my radar. Life is short.

3. Practicality and comfort. Painting, cooking, playing in the sand, at the park… none of these things lend themselves to dry clean only outfits and Gucci heels. I do love nice clothes but I don’t enjoy getting dressed up every single day.

So have I let myself go? What do you think? Have you let yourself go? I suppose looking like a million bucks and having heads turn when I enter the room just doesn’t do it for me anymore so in my mind I have moved on. I think of the frum women and the Muslim ladies who wear very modest dress. Have they let themselves go or are they just asking the world to value them for who they are not what they look like?


Thank you SKM for asking this question. It really raises some interesting issues. I like to look nice but I'm not sure glamour has a place in my daily life. It is hard isn't it? To know what to teach our daughters... To value who they are as people not what they wear and what they put on their faces. I have mixed feelings. Tell me yours!

Wisdom & Fashion

“A wise old owl sat on an oak; The more he saw the less he spoke; The less he spoke the more he heard; Why aren't we like that wise old bird?”


I am definitely not an owl. I am more like a woodpecker, banging on all day not really saying much but making a lot of annoying, repetitive noise. For someone who so admires wise folk it is a shame I don't strive to be more owl-like. I speak before I think and I disappoint myself a lot with my overly talkative nature.


Really I think I should try a lot harder to be more wise. Now that I have a child I often think about the example I am setting for her. So many things I'd like to change about myself, one of them being my big mouth!


Anyway on the topic of owls I thought I might take the opportunity to show you all the work of a very wise lady. Wynona is terribly modest and oh so talented. She has a childrenswear label with her sister Anna, it is called Ivy Designs. A beautiful Aussie handmade-with-love brand that is close to my heart. Their much anticipated winter range has just been released and it did not disappoint. My very favourite is the Owl Pinny pictured below:

Image taken from here: http://www.ivydesigns.bigcartel.com/product/owl-pinny


Oh how I love owls, they are so beautiful and perfect for this little frock. The fabric is ever so pretty and so stylish without being an adults dress in a tiny size. I am very particular about the way I dress my daughter, I am of the belief that children should enjoy their childhood in gorgeous playful clothes. I see no room for children to dress like adults, in clothing designed to makes waistlines look smaller and chests bigger.

I know these days kids are being forced to grow up so quickly. The sexualisation of children worries me greatly, little things like babies in bikinis and mini skirts might be harmless fun to some but to me symbolises a step away from what a childhood should be all about- nice, clean fun! You can get about in skanky attire to your hearts content as an adult why not wear the superman cape to the shops with rain boots and a cute sunhat now? I love pretty childrens clothes but I have no time for sexy or tweenie.

I really think it is a shame to miss out on your only real chance to be playful and innocent. Why start wearing midriff tops and hot pants with lip gloss and trashy shoes when you are 6? You have your whole lives to do that. I'm not into awful dowdy clothes, I love fashion and I love stylish little outfits, I just like them to be fit for children.

What are your thoughts?

It's friday night now and I think I might sit back and read a few magazines I treated myself with this week. Have a lovely weekend everyone. I'm off to a funny store called The Foam Booth to collect my foam order tomorrow. Yes I have some crafting in store, I will definitely post photos when and if I achieve anything of note, I promise!