Strange topic, I know, but I wonder if anyone can relate. The more I blog and discover other blogs (addictive isn't it?) I find myself feeling a rather familiar but unpleasant sensation. Envy.
At university I was always envious of those super chic girls who managed to look fabulous AND win every law school medal all at the same time. While I fumbled with a bulky bag and sneakers and hovered on a credit average. Seriously how did they manage perfect blow dries and heels for 9am lectures? Did they all have cars and parking spots while I schlepped in on the train?
In high school I was envious of the girls who always had the cool clothes and the boyfriends... It wasn't until year 12 that I snagged a boyfriend and even then he was definitely a freak. What was I thinking? Yes I realise that in retrospect a Timberland sweatshirt and bootleg jeans really were hideous but that didn't stop my turning green wishing I owned my very own set.
Now here I am almost thirty, a mother and I'm meant to be all mature. My outlook should be laid back and wise, my feelings tempered and virtuous yet I find myself green with envy again. So what sends me into an emerald hue these days? Well you know those blogs written by other mummies, the really perfect ones? The thin and pretty ones who manage to post these amazingly styled photos of their many children while juggling crafting and cooking and whatever else these supermums manage to fit into their days? And here I am with only one child and I can't manage a tenth of that. Maybe I take the easy route with my daily activities? I don't like chaos. I'm a big fan or order, I like everything to be just so...
Seriously on a practical lever I want to know HOW they do it? While they are gluing pipe cleaners onto egg shells and baking bread from scratch where are their kids? Who is wiping noses, changing nappies and playing pretend with the good cutlery? Who is folding the washing, walking the dogs, making the beds, reading Bumbletum and replying to emails? Who? I just don't get how they do it all?
Does everyone else have armies of staff they just don't mention on their blogs? Or is it just me? Am I just a hopelessly inefficient, chubby, sloth of a housewife? What's going on? I only get 24 hours in my day does everyone else get more? And while I'm there, am I the only blogger who has no web design capabilities? All I see these days are fancypants blogs, stunning bloggers with oodles of time to craft and sew and I can't seem to get my act together to handle more than one play date a week let alone find my sewing machine or get my husband's shirts washed on time. I feel like there might be a conspiracy and nobody is filling me in.